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Friday, February 29, 2008

and in the end, i still find myself being second best to so many people.
i wish i was actually important enough for someone to smile for me.
all i do is probe into people's life and make them unhappy.
if only.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

11:14 PM


Every time i make a new one, the whole thing just ends blandly, without anything more. Everything less, but nothing more. Maybe people like me are just not fated to make them. Perhaps i should just give up. And yet, the thought of being lonely and alone scares me so much that i become, yet again, annoying and irritating, sticking to anyone that i can find. Afraid to lose them because i have lost so many.

and yet. Now, I'm still losing so many.

Losing so many until there is none left.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

12:22 AM

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

i wish i was impt to someone.



anyone in the world will do
because now the thirst for love and care cannot be quench by you anymore, you have given up the right to care about me, did you even want me on this earth? or was it a mistake.

Sorry if this was a mistake. Sorry if i didn't live up to your expectation, but I've been trying my hardest. what else can i do. why can't you be more supportive.



Is it so hard for you to just love me like you love my sister?

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

11:20 PM

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

hoho. i feel quite bad today.
i talked to my jrs and i was quite horrible to them T.T
and i abandoned sylvia to spend time with jieying and zhiying. D=

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:47 PM

Monday, February 25, 2008

ANG WEEWEE YOU'RE SUPER OLD ALREADY.

dont worry, wait for me to catch up with you.

in about 4 days and 1min

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

12:43 AM

Friday, February 22, 2008

hmm
today i went to xinyu's house. i like her mama's noodles. i think i have weird taste buds.

anyway we went to try on somemore dresses. i love the heels that i saw (in bata, strange place to buy heels, but it was really nice. i feel tall in them XD)

then in bata right! i started playing with this indian baby, HAHA he's so cute la. i was hi fiving him all the way and we were happily air boxing each other XD i love that baby.

after coming out from bata and choosing all that dresses we went to the mac express counter there to buy icecream XD

(NEVERMIND. icecream would make me diabetic and fat. but i can't resist)

the stupid person right, make the icecream until the icecream drip on my hand. D=
and xinyu was eating hers so nicely. LOL

i saw felicia! HUGHUG

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

11:50 PM

Thursday, February 21, 2008

ohman. so embarrassing.

why must i have new jrs who looks and stares at guys when we're training in hci!
D=

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

11:30 PM

Wednesday, February 20, 2008







In 2005, US foreign trade of $3.30 trillion constituted 26% of its $12.7 trillion GDP. Exports was $1.27 trillion and imports was $2 trillion, resulting in a goods and services deficit of $726 billion (5.7% of GDP), $109 billion more than the 2004 deficit of $618 billion. For goods alone, exports were $893 billion and imports were $1.7 trillion, resulting in a goods deficit of $782 billion, $117 billion more than the 2004 deficit of $665 billion. This meant that while the trade deficit for goods was large and growing, the US still exported goods in 2005 valued at 192.4 billion 1950 dollars, more than 15 times its export in 1950 and 3 times its 1950 GDP. For services, exports were $379 billion and imports were $322 billion, resulting in a services surplus of $56 billion, $8.5 billion more than the 2004 surplus of $48 billion. US trade deficit with China will greatly reduce if the US lifts high-tech export restrictions to China.For China, foreign trade in 1950 was nonexistent due to US embargo, except some memorandum trade with other socialist and non-aligned nations. For 2005, Chinese foreign trade reached $1.3 trillion (81% of GDP of $1.6 trillion), with a global trade surplus of $102 billion (6.4% of GDP). About $100 billion of the Chinese trade surplus with the US went to pay for Chinese trade deficits with other countries. These figures show that trade is now a precariously excessive portion of Chinese GDP. And without a trade surplus with the US, China will face a global trade deficit of about 6.25% of GDP, more than the US’s 5.7%.

this was what we were doing during IH lesson

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:47 AM

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

just as i cried again

loosing my mind,
loosing control.

this feeling of made used.

D=
what is happiness?

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

8:29 PM

Saturday, February 16, 2008


this is a nice group photo of them in SEED.
that's why seed is better than destiny. forever. =D

OHMAN. after talking with caitong last night, i found myself missing and missing gundam seed more~ I WANNA WATCH AGAIN lol

and i can be the king of the tripping country. i keep tripping over things. argh such a klutz. wheehee

there's a math quiz on monday. i hope i get like at least 6 or maybe 7.
=D


i quite like this picture of kanade =3

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

12:20 PM

Friday, February 15, 2008

I'm sorry.
Would you be happier if i had never appeared in your life?
Maybe i should grow up then you'd be happier.
Sorry about this morning, I promise you i'll never show any emotions in front of you anymore.

Just to let you know, my heart shattered this morning and it's still not alright.

do you still care about me?

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

7:30 PM

Wednesday, February 13, 2008


i like this picture of l'arc en ciel LOL


i like this picture more!


hyde when he was younger?


vampirish hyde in hoshizora. (he cried in the end, but i can't seem to get that pic)


HA. this one was definitely in hoshizora in the AWAKE tour XD


hyde playing e.guit in P'unk en Ciel. SUPER CUTE!


tadah, im not sure where did this come from. hyde's voice is super nice


i love how hyde looks here, what was he singing? i SUSPECT it's either hoshizora or trust


hyde looks like a vampire here


i forgot what he was singing


because hyde is the cutest


and because hyde likes tetsu. i think tetsu looks weird but his bass is really very nice LOL

AND because i'm too lazy to blog today.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

7:35 PM

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

sylvia just spoilt my impression of SJI, because my cousin was in that school, i thought that sch was okay. in the end, sylvia told me about the bunch of weirdos in the bus wearing the sji uniform. their hair had very ugly center parting and was gelled down until like all sticky and disgusting, (at this part we were sneaking glances over at that long lost black tape because he had pretty ugly hair too HAHAHA), and they wore their pants so so so high, and they tucked in their shirts. PLUS, they were smelly.

HAHA. ohman.

and bobdog (wayne) had a gf from PLMGS before. horrors.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

9:39 PM


i was damn suay yesterday, and draw lots somemore!
xingxuan should know what im talking about

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

8:09 AM

Monday, February 11, 2008

What should i say? that i'm really happy to be living in this present time and age?

haha you know i was thinking about those love songs that always go,
"even if i had nothing left, i would still stretch out my hand to you."
but in this materialistic age, would the other party accept the one stretching out their hand? or would this just slap it away with this cruel block of iron.

"even if i had nothing left, i would still stretch out my hand to you."
"and when i get involved in your aftermath, i would gladly pull my hand away from you."

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:40 PM

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Maybe i should stop trying and go back to the little corner where i've been existing all this while, and just lie there till i am found again or when i am dead.
Since everything is better and no one needs me already, i should disappear right? Deeper and deeper in i go and then fade into the darkness. Sometimes i feel so used, it's like people just come and pour their hearts out, not that i dont want to here about their problems, but sometimes it's so frustrating, you feel as if you can't do anything for them and yet they still continue asking and questioning you in this feverish speed. After their problem(s) is solved, they just leave you alone. I know i myself have used people. I am very sorry, i dont mean it and i apologize to all of you who i have made use of... sorry.

And yet i can't just crawl back into that corner yet, everytime i try to fade into darkness and try to sleep, a drop of light tears apart this peaceful darkness. Now, lost in this spiraling column of light, everything appears so bright that it's hard to see where everything would bring me to. Maybe as I'm being bathed in light, i'll just fade and die off because a horrendous creature of darkness is not meant for the light at all. how far can we go before we're separated?

A spill of darkness into your life,
A beam of light in my corner,
That's all it takes for my destruction.

if bliss is a dream, let me lie in deep slumber and never be roused.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:32 PM


the piano has been hijacked again~

it's so early in the morning and yet im fretting about going to her house later. SCARED okay. should i elaborate more? HAHA probably not.
i wanna go for tkd lessons.. and training, im putting on a lot a lot of weight this chinese new year. you know when ever i go to someone's house, there'll be a whole load of food there and somehow every house that we go to wants us to eat as much as we can. AND i don't really like to play cards so i end up being surrounded by food T.T and then i'll eat and eat and eat and eat. i'll probably be putting on about 10kg after this. horrors.

anyway soggae and xinyu~
the eye is quite cute lor. LOL
i wanna dissect thingy thingy again

I'm feeling quite sad about how old hyde is LOL.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

11:20 AM

Saturday, February 09, 2008

=) the class gathering at nick's house was very fun (at least it was to me) HOHO, we did nothing but lied on the floor to watch movies! =3
i finished watching john tucker must die, a little of death note 2 (i want the original disc! who has it boohoo )= lend me!), and most of van helsing (i really wanna watch the last part where he turns into a werewolf and kills dracula~)
the rest was playing cards like siao though, HAHA. the amount of cards at nick's house is super scary. monstrous lor, guess her dad took too many cards when he flew planes LOL

I WANNA CHOU'S MP3! HAHA
her mp3 was hijacked all day

and i love this picture that i took of my grandpa, it's strangely nice looking.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

8:30 PM


amidst the rays of light, i face the finale- it's too bright to face tomorrow
wheehee i love finale by l'arc en ciel

and MY EYE IS VERY CUTE OKAY!!

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

12:17 AM

Thursday, February 07, 2008

lol, everyone just gave up watching ISWAK TKA after the room got noisier.

btw ryu is back in tkd lessons, i thought that he's like snr black already. so amazing, i thought that he was super good in tkd but he like never pass, forever never pass. XD BTW, xinyi right! SHE'S SNR BLACK ALREADY. yay!

lemmie be snr black soon too~ jyjy to my blue tape, hope i pass LOL
my backstance sucks.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

5:53 PM

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Strange mutterings,
dangerous shoutings,
words that slice through your heart.
Hearts that are cracked,
shatter.
Murderous intent,
awkward disappearance,
puffy red eyes,
tear stained faces.

life is screwing me up.

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:17 PM

Friday, February 01, 2008

im getting quite pissed because my sister keeps calling me an idiot. you know it hurts even if i don't show that it hurts? imagine someone younger than you calling you an idiot 24/7 without any valid reason at all...

argh.
i declare that i cannot play the piano, the guitar and the bass.
lets try.

jiayou on sunday

btw! today i went to bethany's house before i went to church. haha her house very cool, although it's a multistory housing estate right, inside each house there's still staircase in it. HAHA so cool lor. and bethany doesn't look like her parents at all. and woah, this was the super wrong time to pop by her house. at first i thought only her mother was at home, so i was like okay, lets go to your house. then i found out her brother was at home too, then her FATHER came back. then the entire family is in the house. feels so weird to be intruding into their family space. BUT ANYWAY. i still wanna go to a lot of people's house. LOL

You took the fall;
And thought of me;
Above all

10:59 PM